Anonymous: I know you've answered questions like this before, but here it goes. I'm 16. I came out last summer in August and since then everything has been going well for me, with my friends and family accepting it, except for my dad as he doesn't know and is not around anymore but that's not the problem. A year and a half ago I was with a girl, who is now one of my best and closest friends! But since then, I've been single and haven't had the courage to find and get to know a guy yet. What should I do? 

Well your choices are limited right now. Mainly because of your age. It’s going to be really hard to meet other gay people in your area because you’re so young. But that doesn’t mean that there won’t be anyone. I met my first boyfriend when I was 16. You just have to be patient. You’re way ahead of the game. Most people don’t start to realize and come to terms with their sexuality until they’re 16, 17, 18, etc… and some take way longer than that. It’s tough and it definitely does get lonely out there. But don’t give up hope. People will begin to come out in the time ahead and your options will open up. Just live life as you have before and love will come to you. Running around looking for love doesn’t get you anywhere.

Anonymous: I just graduated from high school and going to college in the fall. I feel like everything I want out of life won't be available to me if I come out, and it's killing me. I want to be a leader in a church setting and work in child psychiatry in poor countries, but so many of the programs I'm interested in are religious and don't support homosexuality. And I'm worried that I'll live my life alone and never have to just..hold, as cliché as that sounds. How do I cope with this? I feel so alone 

You’re right. A lot of those won’t be available. But that doesn’t mean you should give up on your dreams. There are many LGBT friendly churches across the country. And many of them are incredibly welcoming and would would probably love to have a gay leader in their church setting. They also probably do work in poor countries. And if you can’t find anything you like, then start your own. There’s endless possibilities out there. You just have to look past the conventional and traditional ways of thinking. Don’t let your dreams be compromised because of who you are. 

Anonymous: im 19 years old, only one person knows I'm gay. I play sports in college blah blah. I'm really struggling with this whole gay thing. Really messing with my head lately. I feel like I'm SO alone all the time, yet completely empty. And I know people go through this all the time. But I feel like coming out would be the only thing that would help me. But I'm on a college sports team, and I really don't want me teammates to be uncomfortable with me just because I like dudes. Any advice? 

Don’t let the idea of your sports team hold you back from coming out. It’s your life and your happiness we’re talking about. I know that probably sounds a little terrifying and the idea of your teammates rejecting you for who you are is shit. But straight men aren’t how they used to be. A lot of them are incredibly accepting and welcoming to the gay community. Don’t let that stereotype inside of your head influence your life. You deserve to be happy with who you are. Coming out will make it a lot easier to find someone and fill that empty void you’ve discussed. I know it’s a big scary process. But you’ll be so much happier in the long run. Take some time to think it over. There’s no rush. But this is your life we’re talking about. Not theirs.

Anonymous: Im a straight female but im interested in a bisexual guy. He likes me and wants to date but im just a little confused. I dont want to be rude but I am a little nervous. I dont want to worry about other girls AND guys 

Don’t be nervous. Him being bisexual determines no other aspects of his life than who he likes. I know it’s kind of a crazy idea to become comfortable to at first. But if he’s truly committed to you then you should never have to worry about girls AND guys. Makes sense, doesn’t it? If you want to be with him don’t let something like that hold you back. Everything will be fine!

Anonymous: I believe in god but the god I believe in loves everyone and created everyone the way they are for a reason and I don't think you can choose what your attracted too, I believe in heaven and hell and that everyone has a chance to go to heaven ( if they are saved) but I don't agree that if your saved your "sexuality changes" because god created people how they are for a reason, what are your thoughts? God is love and we are all equal to him in my beliefs 

I believe that God is the essence of acceptance and love, and that he would never change someone, because to him we’re all perfect. I think people constantly try to force upon someone else what their own idea of God is, when in fact God to each and every one of us is entirely different. We all believe in different things, but in the end we all strive for happiness and love, and wish to believe that when we die we’re rewarded for who we are, not punished for who we aren’t. I think that’s a God we can all believe in.

No matter what your beliefs are, find something that suits you and makes you happy. Don’t conform to someone else’s beliefs. We are all humans in search of a greater destiny. Whether you choose to have someone there to guide you along the way is entirely up to you. But no matter what, know you are loved and accepted regardless of what form you come in.

Anonymous: So I'm 17 and gay, and am slowly starting to come out of the closet. I have a seven year old little sister who thinks gay people are weird. I love her to death so I don't want her to dislike me, but I don't know what to say when it comes to her. I just don't want her to reject me. What should I do? 

I think when I was seven years old I thought gay people were weird and gross too. (If I even knew what that term meant, lol) Most of us probably did. But as time went on we all matured and reached a better understanding of the subject. Some of us even finding out that we were gay ourselves. 

Telling your sister that you’re gay is probably going to be a strange subject for her to wrap her head around. But why wouldn’t it be? She’s never been taught differently and she’s never had exposure to the world of homosexuality. 

When you tell your sister you’re gay, don’t expect a warm embrace but don’t expect her to kick you out of the house. She’s a little girl.

You coming out to her now gives you the ability to shape her into an accepting and rounded individual as she grows and matures. Not only are you teaching her acceptance, but you’re teaching her compassion and to love people’s differences.  

It might be difficult at first, but your sister will come around. You’re her big brother and she won’t stay mad at you forever. In fact within the next few weeks I’m sure she’ll be concerned with something else and forget all about it.

Anonymous: You have a great blog! I'm not gay but I love this page so much, its adorable. Ok, I'm not sure if girls are allowed to ask questions so if you don't want to answer this I understand. I have a friend that has been close to me for years and though he hasn't said anything about it I'm under a heavy impression that he's gay. When people at my high school tease him about this he's been getting really depressed & I want to find a way to ask him about it & let him know that I love & support him. Help? 

I honestly think the best way is to simply just ask. I know it’s a strange and uncomfortable conversation to have, but if you’re really that close of friends, he shouldn’t feel like he has to deny it in front of you.

Odds are, if he truly is gay, he probably wants someone to confide in. He probably even wants to tell you, but he’s just too afraid. Making that first step will make it a lot easier on him.

Thank you for being such a loving a supportive friend! Everyone deserves a friend as great as you. :)

Anonymous: First of all I want to say you have a great blog. You have given so many people great advice and I hope you could me give some advice as well. I'm a 21 year old guy. I recently came out gay (for first time ever) to my direct family (what went well). Now i feel i want to tell my group of friends in college who I consider to be my first friends. (High school wasn't that nice). Would you advice me to tell them all together, or one at a time. And what are your opinions about coming out on facebook? 

I think coming out should be done in the way where you feel most comfortable. I don’t really know your friends, but if they are similar in personality (in which I mean that you don’t think one will react totally different than the rest of the group), I say tell them all together.

Telling each person individually sounds like a stressful and drawn out process. It’s better to just rip the band-aid off all at once, rather than take it in steps. 

Now if you think that some may react differently than others, it may be better to tell each one individually. Or maybe select a few at a time instead of a huge group gathering. (I don’t know how many you’re actually planning to tell lol) But if possible, in my opinion a group sounds better and easier.

Facebook should be a last resort option. With that I mean that you should wait until you’ve told everyone you absolutely want to know. Some people might be hurt or mad if they have to find out from social media, rather than hearing it from you. I think you should hold off on this until you’ve told everyone close to you, and then leave the message for the rest of the not so important people.

Which ever you choose, congratulations on coming out! I wish you a lot of happiness and good fortune in the time that follows. :)