I'm 15 and gay. Somewhat open at school and am currently trying to talk to this guy but I can't seem to do it. I just get so nervous because, as ridiculous this may sound, he's perfect. It's been about 3 months and I still can't get over this. I feel that knot in you're throat when I want to say something, I get the butterflies, I get the pounding heart. How can I overcome these feelings and nerves and talk to him? I don't have him for any clases besides weight training. Please help:/
Is he gay? At a young age, approaching someone who isn’t gay and trying to flirt with them or such, might not yield the best results.
If he is gay, then go for it. Have you talked to him ever before? If so, now might be your chance. Don’t let the nerves hold you back.
You have to take risks to achieve happiness. Even if things don’t work out, who cares. You’re only 15. Move on to the next person. Don’t let one person hold you back. There’s so much more life for you to live out there.
One of my favorite quotes comes from the movie We Bought A Zoo:
"You know, sometimes all you need is twenty seconds of insane courage. Just literally twenty seconds of just embarrassing bravery. And I promise you, something great will come of it."
I'm gay and I'm out and yet I find it to be the harder thing about my life. I see guys everywhere who are in relationships and I'm just sitting here like "what's wrong with me?" I legitimately ask myself that question on a daily basis. Why is it so hard for me to find a guy that I genuinely like and want to be with? I just feel like a lonely wolf out in the field.
Sometimes there’s nothing really wrong with ourselves, except our own perceptions that we cast upon us.
Just because you’re not in a relationship doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you. Often times those in relationships aren’t any happier than those who aren’t.
Relationships will come when you stop looking for one so intently. Be happy with your solitude and single-ness. Self confidence is the most attractive thing you can wear.
are girls allowed to ask questions too?
OF COURSE. This is a gay blog, but why would I ever deny someone help?
I dunno how often people thank you, but I've just want to say 'thanks!' in the name of all of them (the ones who ask and those others who don't make the move but read you and are equally helped) for all the kind words. You're an amazing human being.
You’re an amazing human being for taking the time to type that. So thank you :)
I'm 19 and have never been with a girl. And I've thought of myself as bisexual since I was 14. I've always dreamt of one day settling down with a woman and having kids, but I've never felt sexually attracted to women. Instead I'm attracted to guys but could never see myself settling down and living with another man, because of prejudices and I wouldn't want to let my family down. (it was quite a shock when my aunt came out of the closet...)
Being with a man doesn’t let the family down. There is plenty of ways to have a beautiful family with a man. As many as there are with a woman.
(Gay couples are cuter anyway)
Being bisexual is something you should be proud of. Have you been with a boy before? I know you haven’t been with a girl before, so I think you need to experiment with both until you find what you like. You might find you have a preference for one, or maybe you like both equally.
Regardless, experience helps us make the best decisions. You wouldn’t go to a college without researching it first, you wouldn’t buy a car without test driving it first, you wouldn’t rent an apartment without seeing it first.
So why would you make a decision on who you like without being with someone first?
Can i just say, even though i am a straight girl, i still get better relationship and life advice on here there anywhere else! Keep up the amazing work!
Gay relationships aren’t a whole lot different than straight relationships. :)
I think there’s a lesson to be learned in everything. If there’s ever anything you need, gay or straight, feel free to ask.
I'm 14 and I know I'm gay. I live down south and my parents and stepmother are homophobic. I don't know if I should come out at all. My friends are not homophobic at all, I even think one of them is gay but I'm not like girly like a lot of gay people I've seen(no offence). Is that normal?
Is being “masculine” normal, is like asking if being alive is normal. You are who you are. You personality, your actions, your looks, and even your style don’t determine if you’re gay. Your sexual interest in men does.
I’m sorry that your family isn’t accepting of who you are. I know it’s rough to be a teenager going through that transitioning phase.
If your friends are accepting, go for it. It’s great to have a support group and people to lean on.
When the time is right, and you’re a little older, tell your family. Often times we make out their reactions to be way worse than they actually are.
If things don’t go out the way you hoped, at least you have your friends who you can stay with for a few nights or so.
*(If you honestly think they’d create a huge scene, then maybe it’s best to wait. Use your own judgement, not mine)
I'm that type of gay guy, that unfortunately is kind of the feminine type. And I don't want to be that type of guy.( I am currently hiding being gay from my family, and I think they know because of this) I want to be strong and confident, for my man. Any advice to get rid of the wrist, the arm, the walking, and talking (lisp) like girls? I know I shouldn't change who I am, but I'm doing this because I want to, not for any one else. But any advice is greatly helpful!
You’re right, you shouldn’t change yourself for ANYONE.
But unfortunately there’s such pressure in the gay community to be a “macho man”. So, I understand.
In a way I went through this too. I bet a lot of gay men do.
But you learn to be happy with who you are, eventually. I’m guessing you live in a place without a lot of contact with the gay community.
Hopefully one day you’ll have the chance to realize how many gay people there are who are as flamboyant as hell, and damn PROUD of it.
The strongest and proudest people are the ones with the most self confidence.
I was wondering if you've ever fallen for a straight guy. I've been falling for one since about freshman year--of high school--and I just can't seem to let these feelings go. I'm a senior in high school and he's a junior In college now. He's just so perfect and I can't ever stop thinking about him. Basically, I was wondering if there's any way to get over him even though nothing happened. He's one of my pretty good friends as well. I know time is the best remedy, but it sucks. Haha.
Straight men play a crucial role in shaping the gay community as a whole, as surprising as that might sound. I don’t think there’s one gay male who hasn’t fallen for a straight male before. It’s life, it happens.
In this case, you seem to have gotten caught up with this boy for years now. The hardest part is letting go. Letting go of that rope that’s tightly bound to him, dragging you behind him every step of the way.
The best way is to cut that rope.
Does he know your gay? If so, the best chance is to just straight up tell him that you’ve had feelings for him. If he doesn’t feel the same way, then you can finally move on.
If you don’t like that option, try to find someone else. I know that sounds like such a basic answer, but really, what else can you do? Don’t spend your whole life waiting around for someone who won’t love you back.
You’re approaching a crucial part of your life. Spend it with someone who makes you happy.
Do you think a 13 year difference is too big and will cause a problem in a relationship? I really love this guy.
I think a 13 year old difference is whatever you make that difference.
Don’t let a preconceived notion, or even someone running a gay blog dictate who you can be with.
Be with whoever makes YOU happy. If you really love this guy, why should any age difference matter? The happiest couples are often the most unique.
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